Retire your blues!

Many years ago there was a man who was about to retire from active work. He was looking forward to it as there were many hobbies he had cultivated and was keen to pursue them. As the months passed by his enthusiasm grew. His wife was surprised. She discussed it with her friends, “I think my husband is going crazy. He seems to be showing mood swings. This is what doctors call retirement blues. I am concerned.’ Her friends gave her agreed and asked if he had been shown to a psychiatrist, sooner the better is what they recommended. The wife took this seriously. She spoke to her husband, “Don’t you think your behavior is erratic and you need help. You are going to retire and instead of feeling depressed you are euphoric.” The man looked perplexed “I am thrilled, at last I can get up late, eat when I want and laze around the house. I have decided to improve my culinary skills and feed you some lip smacking delicacies. I have decided to take tuitions of tenth grade children and make use of my degree in mathematics. What is your opinion on starting a home business of stock broking?” The man’s wife stared at her husband. She now knew that he was serious. The earth caved under her feet. Did she hear the words right? Her husband was going to be at home and alter her lifestyle. She must do something quickly. She called up her daughter. She didn’t know how she should broach the topic. Her daughter was very fond of her father and she knew getting support would be difficult. She needed to think something fast.

The woman had to distract her mind. She decided to attend her regular kitty party. She needed to get away from her chattering mind. She needed to relax. She had a leisurely bath and soaked her aging limbs in bath salts and dressed in her silk sari, applied a shade of pink on her lips and took her clutch bag and floated out of her front door. Her mood had settled. She saw that her car was not in the driveway. She enquired and was told that her husband had gone to meet his friends. She remembered that he was going to break the news to them about his retirement plans. She observed that there was some agitation. Well, she thought, I must stay calm. She noticed her fingers beginning to press the mobile numbers of her husband. She just stopped and forced her feet to move away. As her feet moved she noticed her thought shift. She hailed a rickshaw and began looking around so her mind would get distracted and move and fix on some other random thought. She tried but over and over, it seemed to now have a life of its own. The thought didn’t like being ignored. It was bouncing up and down. She so hoped it would bounce out, out of her mind but it just was not happening. The auto rickshaw went over a speed breaker and this helped to break the thought. What a respite! The woman was relieved. She began to look at her mobile. She began to stare at her mobile. She began to imagine that her mobile was ringing and a long conversation was ensuing. She was chattering and her mind was at rest. She decided she needs to call someone. She tried calling a friend but her phone was busy. She knew that the disturbing thought was creeping itself in. she must act; do something for it to stop. She started to speak on the phone. Pretense helps. She pretended that there was her friend on the other side. What a relief!

The woman reached her venue for the kitty party. It was her friend Radha’s house. She was very fond of her kitty party friends. All of them had been together for a long time and shared much. As she climbed the stairs she was feeling flighty and happy. She entered to a loud welcome. “We were waiting for you for the housie.” They said in unison. She felt good. She volunteered to be the referee reading out the numbers. Her friends were surprised. They knew how much she disliked doing this. None of them asked her why? They too disliked it as much as her. The woman knew that for the nest hour her mind would be occupied and she would be at peace. She was relieved!

By the end of the housie hour the woman was much at rest. She had kept her mobile on silent so she would not be disturbed. She felt herself laughing at some inane one liner. She saw that one of her friend was teary eyed. She moved towards her. She took her friend aside and asked her if anything was wrong. Her friend held her hands and said that her life was falling apart. She was beginning to become more irritated and angry as the days were progressing. The woman was surprised. Her friend was always so calm in the most trying of times. The friend proceeded to tell her about her husband. He had lost his job and was at home. Her quiet life had been shaken up. Her husband had begun to become demanding and interfering. He wanted his food at a specific time and this had also got the cook irritated. Her husband was all over the house. The newspaper was ruffled and strewn all over the house. His umpteen cups of tea had lined the kitchen sink and the television remote had been conquered. She was a guest in the house. If she needed to go out she had to ask him, if she had to watch her favorite soap she had to ask him, if she needed to sleep in the afternoon, she had to ask him. She was constantly feeling stressed out. Her life was owned by him. A doomed sensation was spreading over her body. Her limbs were feeling weak and her heart was thudding so fast. Her eyes were getting blurred and there was darkness spilling over in front. She was not even listening any longer to her friend. She had to get away. She patted her friend’s hand, mumbling something and excused herself. She had to leave before some more was heard. She smiled and shook hands with the host and left. Her limbs felt weak. She had her heels crumble under the pressure of her mind. She got out and felt the sun sharply in her eyes. Taking out her glares she braced herself. She had to speak to someone. Her auto rickshaw stopped near the traffic signal. She decided to walk the kilometer long stretch for her mind to become calm. She started walking slowly and suddenly realized that the road was being dug up. The garbage dump was over flowing and the stench was nauseating. Her heels could not carry her forward. She was sweating profusely. Her ankles were swollen. She just had to reach home. She stubbornly took her sandals off and walked the entire stretch barefoot. She could feel her body shaking. Her hands were trembling. She somehow reached home and washed her legs with warm water. She sat down and stared at her legs. She had never walked barefoot in mid after ever. She had to get a grip on her situation now or it would be too later. She always prided herself as being in complete control of all situations and this was novel for her. She lay down on the wide angled sofa and closed her eyes. Today had been emotionally draining. As she closed her eyes, a starry vision came up. She realized that the beads of sweat had percolated down into the lashes. She wiped it and rested. Her mind had actually become blank. It seemed as if the warm sweat had erased her thoughts. Ah! Sweating never seemed useful until this moment. She felt sleepiness take over and she was relieved!

The sound of the doorbell struck her as knell. She startled and sat up. She looked at the clock which had also begun to chime six. My God! It was six already. She got up and sat straight. Her heart had suddenly revived and she had developed sharp hearing abilities. She could hear her husband’s voice booming in the corridor. He was asking for her. She was suddenly feeling little. Had her husband picked up her thoughts? Was he going to ask her for an explanation? She must brace herself. She picked up a magazine and pretended to surf through it. Her husband entered and gave her a peck on her cheeks. She was taken aback. He had never done this for a long time. As she looked up he was smiling. His face was looking younger and brighter. Had he started drinking in the afternoon? Her husband sat next to her. This was also a new behavior. He took her hand in his and gently rubbed it. She was puzzled. She sniffed under his breath. What! Her husband said, “Do you think I am drunk?” She lowered her lashes,”Are you?” She was relieved that she was able to speak. Her husband laughed, he knew is wife well. He took out two airline tickets and placed them in her hand. We are going for our honeymoon. This time to Rome and Italy. After that to the US to meet your sister. I want to fill your life with happiness and spend some good time with you. I have worked hard so that we can enjoy our latter years comfortably. The woman was stunned. She had not expected this. She looked at him again. He winked, ‘I am not drunk dear, just beginning to live.” He got up and took his newspaper and folded it. He kept it neatly under the center table and picked up the ashtray and put it in the drawer. He declared that he would never need it as he had given up smoking. He did not want her to suffer second hand smoking. He was going to the gym which he had enrolled for today. He whispered in her ears, ‘You will have no complains when I retire, I know this had you worried.”

The woman was speechless. She looked sheepishly at her husband. She picked up the phone and called her daughter. As she gave the news of their European trip, her daughter congratulated her for she loved the idea of a second honeymoon. “You deserve it Mum, I know how much you have done for Dad and its time he did all this for you.” Was she listening correctly? Her daughter praising her efforts? Her daughter went on, “You know Mum, Dad has been planning to give you a surprise for a long time and I am so happy that he has you by his side. You are going to be his perfect retirement partner. I love you. I have to rush to pick your granddaughter from her music class, so long.” The woman was feeling so light and happy. There was no stress in her body. The love she had just experienced from her husband and daughter was new and wonderful. All the years of insecurity and confusion just vanished. She got up and washed her face. She saw her husband dressing up for his gym. She had also been thinking of going to her gym to get her bones functioning well. She looked at her husband. He saw her glance and said, “Why don’t you too join the gym with me. It will be wonderful to get in shape before our trip. He winked mischievously. The woman smiled and nodded.

Both of them walked down the stairs together. They held hands as they walked out in the bright sunshine. They sat in the car and drove feeling the magic of togetherness. All the doubts disappeared and the woman was in seventh heaven. Her heart was skipping a beat and her mind relieved!          

 All you women retire your blues.